What Really Happened
Half of the people who were in the bet are now out. And the unlikely final five are as follows: Evan, Jared, Andrew, Kent, and Joel. Honestly, I'm pretty sure I'm going to win this time. My biggest competition was Matt but now it's between Andrew and Evan. But what about all the other people who are out? What was so great about this weekend that knocked five people out? Well, I conducted some research (by research I mean that I have nothing to do in seventh period and that's why I'm writing this) and this is what I found out:
Short after our deep fried disgustingness was done David found himself sitting alone in his house with nothing to do. He decided to go on his computer to reminisce by looking through his photo database at old pictures. During these excavations he stumbled across his modified picture of Manielle Oliveria and was so excited by the unibrow, mustache, and striking resemblence to Groucho Marx that he went back into his cupboards to get the deep frying oil and the rest is history and stains...
Friday night when Anthony was walking his girlfriend with his dog (wait a tick...) he was severly overcome by something I like to refer to as "the urge." After slight resistence he realized what had to be done. He looked at his girlfriend (who was feeling pretty frisky herself) and looked at his dog. Then did another round of the looking game before making his final decision. So if you see his dog anytime in the next week you now know why it's walking like a two pound chicken who layed a three pound egg...
Jason had just settled down for the night with his romance novel and a fondu set of chocolate and strawberries when the urge hit him. It was either the specific chapter in the novel about the "long, masculine, shaft" or the strawberries that reminded him of his childhood babysitter, or the fact that he had just finished his daydream of Ms. Farris jumping on his trampoline. Whatever it was, we all know that he's out for reasons that were apparently "beyond his control..."
To be quite honest, I don't think we'll ever know what happened to Matt that knocked him out so soon. But an usher from the Los Banos theatres claims that he saw him "getting off" on the robot character voiced by Robin Williams when he went to see the movie for the fourth time late Friday night. Today in third period he confessed to me that the reason why he went again on Saturday was because he wanted to see if the robot had forgotten about him, or just misplaced his number...
I think it's pretty obvious what happened to Moises but I'll tell the story for those of you who can't put two and two together. (It's four Cindy.) Well, after partaking in the deepfried Cheetos and bananas from Saturday afternoon, Moises found himself to have a bad case of the splashies (diareah, Cindy) when he got back from the movies that night. So, he let it all out in an orderly-as-possible fashion and started scrubbing his butt with intense intensity. I guess it felt so good that he couldn't stop until it was too late and his dollar was spent...
So, that's how it all went down. Five down, five to go. Place your bets now in the comment box so it looks like more people read my post.
Short after our deep fried disgustingness was done David found himself sitting alone in his house with nothing to do. He decided to go on his computer to reminisce by looking through his photo database at old pictures. During these excavations he stumbled across his modified picture of Manielle Oliveria and was so excited by the unibrow, mustache, and striking resemblence to Groucho Marx that he went back into his cupboards to get the deep frying oil and the rest is history and stains...
Friday night when Anthony was walking his girlfriend with his dog (wait a tick...) he was severly overcome by something I like to refer to as "the urge." After slight resistence he realized what had to be done. He looked at his girlfriend (who was feeling pretty frisky herself) and looked at his dog. Then did another round of the looking game before making his final decision. So if you see his dog anytime in the next week you now know why it's walking like a two pound chicken who layed a three pound egg...
Jason had just settled down for the night with his romance novel and a fondu set of chocolate and strawberries when the urge hit him. It was either the specific chapter in the novel about the "long, masculine, shaft" or the strawberries that reminded him of his childhood babysitter, or the fact that he had just finished his daydream of Ms. Farris jumping on his trampoline. Whatever it was, we all know that he's out for reasons that were apparently "beyond his control..."
To be quite honest, I don't think we'll ever know what happened to Matt that knocked him out so soon. But an usher from the Los Banos theatres claims that he saw him "getting off" on the robot character voiced by Robin Williams when he went to see the movie for the fourth time late Friday night. Today in third period he confessed to me that the reason why he went again on Saturday was because he wanted to see if the robot had forgotten about him, or just misplaced his number...
I think it's pretty obvious what happened to Moises but I'll tell the story for those of you who can't put two and two together. (It's four Cindy.) Well, after partaking in the deepfried Cheetos and bananas from Saturday afternoon, Moises found himself to have a bad case of the splashies (diareah, Cindy) when he got back from the movies that night. So, he let it all out in an orderly-as-possible fashion and started scrubbing his butt with intense intensity. I guess it felt so good that he couldn't stop until it was too late and his dollar was spent...
So, that's how it all went down. Five down, five to go. Place your bets now in the comment box so it looks like more people read my post.
posted by kibitzer at 2:13 PM
4 Comments:
You lie. I still think it's five. Or zero. It depends. I'm just glad you didn't mention me anywhere else. You did mention a Cindy though. Yeah, that mention was suicide inducing. It was claw-your-eyes-out-with-a-rubber-spoon painful.
i didnt use deep frying oil. thats just sick.
haha that's the funniest post so far.
Well, I was talking with Jared (who is still in) and he was saying that last night he was actively conversing with himself to make it though the night. I then replied, "Yeah, I kinda wanted to get back to normal, when I wasn't talking to myself." As far as the Robin Williams character, Fender, I think he's a complete rip off of Bender from Futurama. The only difference is that Bender is cool and Fender is a useless robot with the hyperactive comedy of Robin Williams. That robot didn't "do it for me".
Post a Comment
<< Home